Photo Tuesday (on Thursday)

From The Thing of the Moment.

Hint: clicking on the picture advances back an entry. Not all of them are successful, but there's some nice surprises in there.

Untitled

And now for something completely hilarious.

Loyalty is underrated

And it's not just me.

I got a loyalty card in the mail today. From Golf Galaxy. A store I like to visit. It's close. It's full of golf stuff. It's reasonably priced.

I went there the other day to buy golf balls (I tend to lose upwards of six a round, so I was angling for dollar-a-ball or better.) I settled on a box of TopFlites for the well-marked price of 9 bucks and change.

And then the GG dude asks me if I'm a member of their loyalty program.
"No" I said, as flatly as possible. (De ja vu?)
"Why not?"
"Honestly? I hate that shit."
(This is a risk in a golf store. Typically golfers only curse when they've just shanked a three wood into the pond. Under their breath, no less)
"Why?"
"Why should I?"
"To get that price" he says, indicating the giant 9-and-change price, which I suddenly realized had a smaller, bigger price and a fucking asterix next to it.

*sigh*

Fine.

*defeated*

Sign me up for your 'loyalty' card.
What's wrong with this? Or my recent feel-good post about US Airways? Or the fact that I have to make a show out of flipping through all the tags on my keychain trying to find the correct one for the correct grocery store that day?

Loyalty my ass. Cut out the loyalty crap. If you wanted me to be loyal, you'd invest in a great brand experience. You'd respect my "piss off" countenance when approached about a loyalty card. In short, you'd have a product or service worth loyalty.

This tagging system is like what National Geographic guys track tuna migrations with. I am just another blip on the economic radar. And the only bonuses I see are: slightly less than retail pricing and a shitload of spam for my trouble.

But it seems like insanity to pay the extra four dollars for balls I'm going to shank into a pond. So I fork over my info.

What the hell?

Hell, for me, will be comprised of a special bundle of uncomfortable tediums, poorly prepared food and a tremendous amount of physical pain. At least, that will be my hell on earth. The scorching flesh and anguish of my soul may be a different matter altogether, although not much less bearable.

Allow me to describe the places that remind me of hell.

The humid be-dog-pooped mire that is my backyard, with a full two weeks worth of grass.

The five-block walk from my office to my parking garage at 8:30 PM when the street is still 95 degrees and smells distinctly like alcoholic barf and pee.

Cold french fries and bacon that tastes like bait.

Smooshing my thumb between the Costco cart and 50lbs of dogfood. It's irritating to think that 50 lbs. of dog food translates to roughly 100 lbs of dog poop in my stifling backyard.

Stepping, with my full weight, on a small lego creation. Right in the middle of my arch. In the dark.

The smell of damp air that reminds me I need to have my vents cleaned, which means I need to track down a vent-cleaner, which means I need to employ some contractor to come disappoint me for money.

Any phonecall to a customer service center.

Any phonecall that includes hold music.

Any phonecall that requires me to speak to a manager.

Any phonecall I receive on my cell phone for "Donny", who evidently runs a very successful drywalling business despite the fact that he hasn't updated any realtor in Dallas with his new cell phone number.

Office coffee.

When there's NO office coffee.

Damp socks.

Alex

Creativity online has started a series titled "On Creativity". First out of the chute, the venerable Alex Bogusky. Say what you will about his hair (much better) his jacket (not video-friendly) and his poker face (I think he doesn't officially smile until he talks about how happy the mayor of Boulder is to have CPB in town – 3:30 or so into the clip), but he seems pretty down to earth for a guy in charge of what is considered arguably the single most important ad agency of the last ten years.

Thank God Teressa Iezzi – who, incidentally, cannot stop herself from grinning like a school girl as she pronounces "Alex Bogusky" in her intro (:12 in) – doesn't spring some "Kafka Questionaire" bullshit on him. Just the standard stuff: How's Boulder? How was Cannes?

One nit - cutting away to Teressa during Alex's answers (Who does she think she is, Morley Safer?) does nothing for this little production. She shows no visible reaction other than a trembling nod throughout.

Worth the 5:00+ viewtime.

Holla Blue Hens?

Usually, it would make me all tingly to see a Blue Hen make it into the ad press, no matter how shabby the ad press tends to be when it comes to actual journalism. Usually. And Ellen Steinberg has been raised to demi-god-like status in the UD VC program, along with the likes of Franklin Tipton, Bill Oberlander, Craig Cutler, and Kirk Souder.

Ellen spoke to my ad class while she was busy kicking major ass at Fallon in the nineties. Even brought along a coworker: Bob Barrie. Word has it she continues to to kick said ass at McKinney Silver. And so, to see her face grinning from the pages of Adweek... University of Delaware isn't necessarily one of the ad schools you hear about in the same sentence as Portfolio Center, Miami Ad school and VCU. So when a Blue Hen gets it done, I take notice.

But this guest critique is horrible. Not one to blow smoke - even if she's a fellow VC Grad AND a gold pencil winner AND a CD at an agency I wouldn't mind working for - I gotta call 'em as I see 'em.

Without a doubt this is the most irritating thing I've read in Adweek. Ever. This horse is dead, beaten, blended, choked down, pooped out, blended and beaten again for good measure. What the fuck is she talking about? Advertising?

An Excerpt:

I happily waded in the 30-second puddle over and over again to satiate my fascination with the fact that someone out there found a guy who strongly resembles Homer Simpson, Grampa, Otto (the bus driver) and, yes, even Krusty the Clown. "The world is going Simpsons, and BK is in on it." As I said, not exactly genius, but genius I think is on holiday this time of year.

Critiquing advertising is, in my opinion, inane enough without being indirect and incoherent. 'Satiate my fascination'? Jesus.

She sounds like me, at Rays' 60th birthday party, when the water ran out and I was forced to switch over to straight vodka. Good times. Good, hard-to-understand times.

I'm blaming this on Adweek. This is exactly what editors are for. Editors look at a critique like this and come up with a nice way to say: cool idea, Ellen. Can you make it a little less - um - irritating? Ellen is an art director (like me). She needs an editor.

Lord knows I've violated the irritating clause. Probably weekly with this blog. I don't have the benefit of a national publication editor (yet - any takers?)

While I hope I'm not shitting the strangely small, ad-industry bed here, I can't stand idly by when a fellow Blue Hen is permitted to fall so flatly on her face.

Shame on you, Adweek. But thanks for giving me something to slap around on an otherwise newsless week.

Customer Service: US Airways

Time for me to once again pull the spotlight into the shadowy corners of that myth of all myths: customer service. I pride myself on the fact that my customer service blogs have drawn a TON of hits. And every time I get a new one, I love blogging a little more.

As a sometime resident of PA, I have an extensive history with US Air. And over the course of three years flying back and forth to Puttsburgh on almost a weekly basis, I managed to rack up a couple miles. Enough, in fact, for a free flight to the Caribbean if I so chose. Of course in the infinite wisdom of US Air, if you don't use these miles or if there is no activity on your account, they close it after 18 months.

Why? Because I died? Because I no longer fly on airplanes? Because I have obviously moved to a city with a different carrier hub?

I guess rules is rules.

Message generated on www.usairways.com at 8/7/2007 8:50:53 PM.

Several times over the last few months I have set about to try and track down my US Air miles - and several times I have found the US Air website hard to navigate and uncooperative. When I finally decided to try and track down my Dividend miles account, I was told it just expired 30 days ago. Given that I've had so much trouble using the website, I'm hoping you can give me a break and reinstate my miles - I plan to continue to use USAir for travel, including travel to Europe, through Philadelphia, in the near future.

I got a reply a few days later:

Thank you for contacting US Airways.

I apologize that we were not able to respond to your email in a more timely manner.

With the new Mileage Reactivation Policy, which went into effect after January 31, 2007, miles are subject to forfeiture if the member has not had activity within 18 months. This new policy was announced on May 21, 2006 on usairways.com. We also sent e-mails and direct mail communication to members who were most impacted by the change. Your account shows that your last activity date was 11/18/2005 and 30,688 miles were forfeited.

We realize you may have attempted to earn miles or used US Airways or a partner recently. Please make sure you submit your request for missing credit at usairways.com or by contacting our partner now.

Members have three options to reinstate forfeited miles.

1. Pay $200.00 reactivation fee which is based on the number of miles being reinstated.
2. Earn miles with one of our credit card partners. Allow 4 to 6 weeks from your first purchase using your new card for miles to start crediting to your Dividend Miles account.
3. Purchase and fly a First Class or Envoy trip on US Airways / America West in fare codes A. F, C, D or Z. (GoFirst, GoEnvoy, GoSleeper upgrades are not valid to reinstate forfeited miles.)

These options are time sensitive. The timeframe during which you may reinstate forfeited miles may vary, depending on your last activity date at the time you forfeited your miles and which option you choose. If you choose the option to earn miles with one of the credit cards or to fly, allow sufficient time for the activity to post to your account as the miles must post within 36 months of the above activity date. When miles for the credit cards or flights credit to your account, forfeited miles will be reinstated automatically. After the deadline, there is no option to reinstate the miles because miles are permanently deleted after 36 months of inactivity.

To reinstate forfeited miles, contact the Dividend Miles Service Center at 1-800-428-4322.

For details on our Mileage Reactivation Policy, visit our website at http://www.usairways.com/awa/content/dividendmiles/
programdetails/memberguide.aspx#milexpire

We appreciate your continued patronage of US Airways.

Denise Villatoro
Dividend Miles Service Center

I love that last line: "We appreciate your patronage."

So much so that I can buy my miles back for $200. I can sign up for a credit card. Or I can fly first class. In the next 36 months. Because I missed a cut-off 30 days ago. Because I moved. And couldn't operate their website.

Appreciation, by definition, is thankful recognition. That -and $200- will reinstate my miles.

I write back:

Denise,

Can I assume you can not make an exception, based on my poor experience with your website? As I stated, I tried, several times, unsuccessfully to update my account online. The emails you sent in May 2006 went to an email address that is no longer active. The direct mail wasn't forwarded to my new Texas address. As such, I didn't get them. When I tried to update my information with US Air on your website, I had continual disconnections, dead links and circular directions which were completely unhelpful.

And now, as I prepare to book a May flight from Philadelphia to Glasgow on USair, you can't help me out?

Can one of your supervisors help me?

In the mean time, I have reason to ressurrect my LONG idle Southwest Airlines Rapid Rewards account. I talk to a nice woman (on the phone!) and explain it's been years since I've flown Southwest and that it may be hard to track down exactly which address my account is associated with. She asks for my name. And then she reads back my present address. So Southwest has a database that automatically updated my address despite a move out of, and then back into Texas. Interesting. Oh yeah. And all three of my segments from previous trips (in 2002) are still in my account. And Southwest is the one that isn't digging its way out of bankruptcy? Really?

Stop back for updates.

-------

Update: 9/13/07

Mr. Helms,

Thank you for contacting US Airways. I apologize for the delayed
response to your request. We will be happy to reinstate your miles due
to non-notification. Your new account balance is 30,688 miles. Please
be sure to post activity to your account within 18 months to avoid
future mileage forfeiture.

We appreciate your continued patronage of US Airways.

Bobbi Pearce
Dividend Miles Service Center

And there was much rejoicing.

I have to say I've been feeling pretty good about the traffic this post has received. My google-ometer shows just under 100 people has found this post when searching "US AIRWAYS customer service"

I am pleased that, without a whole lot of escalation, I managed to get 'em to hook a brother up. But I am stillway more impressed that Souwest Airlines managed to keep track of my info despite the fact that I moved three times over a 3 year period, and none of my segments has expired.

'at's it, mate

Talking me into a gin and tonic is not exactly a hard sell proposition. So it's easy to like what's going on here.

But really? This guy's personality (try Tony's Telly for the most vivid portrayal) is kind of wanna-be gin to me.

I think Rangpur hit it better. And the music is better, too.

BTW: I'd like to quickly weigh in on online age verification. WTF? It's a beating for legal folk. It's unenforcable for the underage. It's like the TSA if it wasn't actually manned by a bunch of angry unemployables.

Frigging Say It

Rudy and Buffy, at Tattoo Projects, are not apt to mince words. At least in my personal experience (Buffy lambasted my choice of footwear in mid-recommendation on LinkedIn).
You want hot co-workers? Just ask.

Overt-ness. It's a strategy that has worked for me. Quit pussy-footing around the damned obvious and tell me what you're thinking. So if you want to hire people who look good in a belly shirt or a pair of leather pants, frigging ask for it.

Of course, as a student of the well-crafted creative brief, I'll tell you: Pick a single compelling point. And then execute the motherloving shit out of it. Either get talent that kicks ass. Or get talent with nice ass. Looking for both and you start looking for a needle in a North Carolina haystack.

I, of course, have both. But, alas, I live in Dallas.

Aim High

Those of you who've heard me blather on about this campaign know how exciting this is to me. I'm fully intrigued by the black-and-white lead up. Surely it'll be impactful.

Tease

Thought this spot would lead to something else.
In fact,it leads to itself.

I give it a six (it does, after all, feature an attractive - if depersonalized - model in her underwear.)

UPDATE:

Oh. I see. She has friends who also do weird stuff in their underwear. Now I give it a seven. It's a myspace campaign. I get it.

Lens

Expand your world view.
I like the global view - makes a great screen-saver.

Thanks to Bill (who, in turn, thanks his own sources.)

In My day...

This was a bad thing. If you could slap your competition's logo on your ad - if you literally had to "keep up with advertising" by subscribing to an ad service tofigure out which brand was responsible for which generically well-designed ads, you weren't doing your job. If your competition could claim the same thing, it wasn't worth claiming. I guess that was then?

image via ads of the world

End to End

This banner leads to this website.

Like the banner. Liked the shoes. Liked the website.

PY Caveat: I am a Link Whore

It's true. I spread the link love wildly and without a good deal of thought - or love even. As transparent as it may seem, actually YonderPonder was created for an audience of one: me. Basically a place for me to collect my thoughts - my favorite links - and to ponder on the yonderness of it all. And then, lo and behold, some of you started reading it.

I have no idea why.

I'm no authority on marketing. Or advertising. Or art. Or golf. Or Verizon's utter lack of customer service. Or Angelina's tattoos.

I just find stuff I like and dump it in here to remind me why I'm in this sometimes idiotic business. From the double headed perspective of an advertiser and one who is advertised to.

I leave the poignant observations to people with sociology degrees and book credits. My opinion is very much like an asshole: it stinks just as much as everyone elses. And it's just a necessary: a way to get poison out of my system before it poisons me.

I started this blog with no agenda. I continue to post to this blog with no specific goal in mind. I am amused by my technorati "Authority" rating. I am amused by my web traffic tracker. I am amused by the kind of googling that leads people to Yonderponder.

Whatever your reasons for reading this blog: thanks. You are not reading the words of a pundit with authority. Other than the authority of a 34-year-old 10 year veteran of advertising with a family, a job, and a taste for barbecue.

On with the inanities.

Screw the Herd

Adliterate throws brainstorming under the train.

Describing the experience as one "in which too many people, with little ultimate responsibility for the quality of the outcome whitter on for far too long to the increasing frustration of the problem owner. Frustration manifestly worsened by the cult of facilitation."

Amen, brother.

Furthermore: "for my money, the optimum number of people for an idea generation session is two with no facilitator hanging on. Two people that have a vested interest in the quality of the outcome and can switch seemlessly between divergent and convergent thinking until they get to the right idea which they both then build upon.

It is one of the reasons that Bernbach was a genius in putting art directors and copywriters together and a reason that strategists should also be paired, or paired with individual creatives."

This article alone is enough of a reason to permalink this blog.

Photo Tuesday

Found this in my favorite photographers' new work section. Quintessential summer.

Big Ol' Howdy

Bill Green is a big motherfucker.

I know this because I met him and his merry band of Plaid pranksters at Bar of Soap in a section of Dallas I rarely visit for a quick, cheap beer and a chat about how a Plaid Van can connect with marketing folks from Connecticut to Nashville to Dallas and points in between. It's a fascinating example of putting your money (and your agency's marketing) where your mouth is.

With a simple vehicle wrap, a van-cam, a huge flickr set, an hourly twitter update, IMs ablazing and no shortage of appointments and cold calls, Plaid Nation embraced a bunch of very simple new media and demonstrated just how compelling it can be. Did they get in every door? No. Did they pay for their trip in new business? Yup. Was it fun? Yup. It has the hallmarks of any great marketing endeavor. Including the one where they want to try it again to see what they can do better next time.

And they got to sample some half decent chow (NJ is a tough to town to get a decent barbecue sandwich - or so I've heard.)

Always cool to meet a fellow blogger. And cooler to see them out shifting the paradigm in a silly van full of electronics.

Photo credit: Plaid

Sequel blues

Adrants is featuring the West Coast answer to the Tea Partay. It ain't all that. However...
Thanks to one of the hatin' commenters, I picked up this jewel.


Always funny to hear actual hip hop lyrics.
Makes me think of the Gourds.

...and my little friends

Fox has news.
And like any good creative, he's making it quite a production.

Good for you, bro. Mazel tov.

Say hello to my little friend

Not my best effort, but a good product of an otherwise lackluster afternoon.

Sidebar

I'm in the middle of some animation research and came across one of the finest shorts from one of my favorite artists: the Art Director Hall of Fame's own Chuck Jones. Worth ten minutes out of your busy day. Takes me back to afternoons spent building with Lego in front of the tube.