Juiced

I'm just back from a great evening at the Slingshot client dinner, featuring Joseph Jaffe. Surely some of you linkers and lurkers know Joseph Jaffe - certainly the Art of the Conversation crowd knows him. Most bloggers have at least heard his name.

Yeah, well...
He harped on all kinds of great stuff but one thing I found myself pondering is this: of all the things brands think they can outsource, why does customer service seem like a good idea?

How important do you feel to be connected (and subsequently put on hold and then maybe dropped and maybe or maybe not reconnected) to a customer service associate with a strange accent on a bad connection?

Think about this: the only people that call customer service are YOUR EXISTING CUSTOMERS. A bird in hand is worth two in the bush, right? Shouldn't you spend twice as much money keeping and nurturing your existing client relationships as you do creating new ones? If you did, would the new ones create themselves?

Think about this: if you google Verizon Ecenter or USair miles reinstated you get diatribe-esque results from the unwashed likes of ME, your consumer, in the first ten results.

Wholly FUCK! you may say (esp. if you're one of the two clients whose customer service is systematically dissected and exposed in each of those posts - which I assure you, are the two most frequently read posts on this blog by far).

If you are Verizon or USair (or UPS or Sprint), you may think you have bigger problems right now than one blogger. Having used and been disappointed by your products, I'd agree with you.

However, Joseph's hypothesis and mine are the same: your customers matter in ways you aren't addressing. And Lord only knows why.

I have a Verizon account (and I fucking HATE Verizon) and I fly, begrudgingly on USair. And rather than vote with my feet and my dollars, I prefer to vote with my discontent in both of these brands and their products. I've paid outrageously in time, money and aggravation for the right to do so. And goddammit I'll get every penny's worth.

The fact that neither of these companies has what I consider to be outstanding customer service (the kind I'll rave about from Southwest Airlines, USAA, Zappos, and Apple) proves to me that these companies have lost touch with their consumers. And think it's okay to send us form emails. And lead us to FAQs that in turn lead us to FAQs in a never ending, and utterly frustrating loop of, "was this item helpful?"

I voice a thundering "NO, IT WAS NOT HELPFUL" here. For you. And your friends. And anyone with a search engine. And some dignity.

break out

Cool reinterpretation of an old classic.
Nokia NGage -- thanks to carb free creativity.

In pursuit of an energetic director

There's a lot of love in here.

Stan Richards' recent guest column in Talent Zoo got mixed reviews. I say mixed because it was not universally panned - but the negative majority were a bad combination of eloquent and vociferous.

As one of very few creatives in Dallas to never step through the doors (other than to interview for an internship there 10 years ago) I must admit I'm curious - it has the feel of Willy Wonka's factory from out here. Big building looming over I75, Futura Bold logotype emblazened across the roofline. Strange and wonderful smells emitting (is that midnight oil burning? Or burnout?)

I have lots of friends on both sides of the wall - and everyone seems to agree on this: Stan must be doing something right to be growing that business the way he has.

But I have also heard this one: If enough people tell you you're drunk, go lie down.

Trend alert - electrifying wallpaper

These guys invented wallpaper that turns you off.


This guy invented wallpaper that you turn on.

Thanks to Vulture Droppings for the poop, as usual.

Suite

A new low

For the presidency. And for this President.
Sharing the stage with Howie Mandell.

I am not perfect. I do not demand perfection.
But I think the President of the United States should be aiming a lot higher than lackluster Prime Time cameos. Quit entertaining us and start serving us.

You want to be on Prime Time TV? Shave your head and dare people to push the big red button for you. Otherwise, stick to averting nuclear disasters and being fiscally irresponsible.

Director Tuesday

Hate him. Love him.
James Copeman reminds me of everything that was once good about music videos.

I've been thinking about the Mystery Jets video for Young Love since the first time I saw it on Carb Free Creativity.

And his Noah and the Whale video has a Wes Anderson sensibility that makes me happy, too.

Jack's Track

Nascar fans rejoice. Jack's Track is up and running.

For credits and more info, see Shottiework.com.

How integrated is your campaign?

I spoke at the University of Texas today - to two classes of advertising students.

Class #1 had 300 students: "Introduction to Advertising".

Before the class, as I sat sipping on a Diet Coke in the Jester Wendy's, I counted the number of students walking by who WEREN'T clutching, listening to, talking, or texting on a mobile device. I think it was 8 (of a possible 300?). I mean DAMN! I thought the Dallas Tollway was a mobile phone paradise - the Student Center at UT is downright bionic.

of the 300 students in the class, easily 200 were typing NOISILY on their laptops throughout the presentation. I suppose this is the norm now - and you'd all do wisely to invest in the quietest keyboard company out there. There's a market for it. Lord knows if this was note-taking, IMing about my plaid pants, or chatting with mom - but it was more than a little distracting. I don't blame them. I'm old and old people suck.

Those kids today!

The second class was a more manageable 15 or so seniors graduating in May.
Here was my challenge to them:

Start thinking of yourself as an integrated campaign.
A portfolio, sure. But more importantly a website, a blog, email marketing, direct mail, video, etc.
Make it as compelling as you are. Hell - this is advertising - make it ten times as compelling as you are. Tell me a good story. Leave me interested enough to follow your breadcrumbs. Start the story on your website, pay it off with a series of videos on YouTube. Start your own wiki. whatever. Make sure it involves both thought and effort. Oh - and some design. And make it compelling. Did I say that already? Good. Make it FUCKING COMPELLING.

Compel me to figure it out. Compel me to share it with my boss an look like the hero that found the needle in the talent haystack. Make ME look like a genius and I'll hire you to become advertising's next superstar.

I mean it. How cool would that look on MY resume?

How to think (twice removed)

Dan Linsky, resident thinker, posted this article, originally found on Ed Boyden’s Blog. Technology Review. 11/13/07. (http://www.technologyreview.com/blog/boyden/21925/).

Key takeaways. Thinking is active. If you're not REALLY doing it, you're probably not doing much of it. Something to think about. HARD.

Short Film Tuesday

Ambitious stuff.
More at facebook.

Instinct

Sprint MAY have come up with a phone that's worth a damn, after much bitching from the likes of me.

Of course it occurred to me this could be an elaborate April Fool's hoax: that fucking thing looks suspiciously like an iPhone on its side.

I'm such a sucker.