Tuesday, August 20, 2013

An Ode to Idiots

Screw you, dude who nearly drove me off the road tonight, holding your iPhone inches from your face as we drove, side-by-side through a school zone. Screw you, lady who -- despite my fluorescent yellow shirt, flashing tail light and broad-daylight-timed ride -- swerved out of my lane approximately ten feet behind the rear wheel of my bike only as I swung my head back at her in disbelief. A lone, long upright finger to you, jerk who turned that huge parking garage into valet-only. Another to the guy who emptied the coffee pot and didn't make another pot. And to that bitch on my flight who smashed her seat back into my lap. Oh wait. I've been those people. Apologies, friends. Strangers. Fellow idiots. My bad.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Hahaha I loved this. :)